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Post by philthewindsurfer on Mar 16, 2020 16:26:15 GMT
Matt Hancock is planning for extra ventilators and the Americans are planning extra ventilations. That one deserves one of these....... ......... err, there is no hand clapping smiley, have those been banned? |
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Post by mekon on Mar 16, 2020 17:28:21 GMT
All those prepping weirdos are probably wanking themselves stupid now, sat on a pile of shotguns and military rations, just waiting for someone to try and take their stash.
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Post by elnoodle the reasonable on Mar 16, 2020 17:51:35 GMT
Well, football's fucked and we're being told to stay away from bars and restaurants now. By the end of tomorrow, there'll be fuck all to do but wank yourself stupid.
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Post by elnoodle the reasonable on Mar 16, 2020 17:52:30 GMT
Best start stockpiling porn in case the internet breaks.
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Post by beefus on Mar 16, 2020 18:06:41 GMT
I’m working from home as of tomorrow...
Dutch PM in the middle of addressing the nation right now....,
I’ll nip upstairs for a wank shortly.
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Post by beefus on Mar 16, 2020 18:11:59 GMT
"Any you fucking pricks COUGH! and I'll execute every mother fucking last one of yaow" Seen a few people doing that without covering their mouth and nose....fuckin unbelievable, fuckin twats. |
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Post by philthewindsurfer on Mar 16, 2020 18:36:02 GMT
Best start stockpiling porn in case the internet breaks. Anyone got a VHS player they aren't using? |
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Post by Droog on Mar 16, 2020 18:51:58 GMT
Fucking morons everywhere. Panic buying and living in fear. Imagine if something serious happened like world war 3. We'd be fucked.
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Post by mekon on Mar 16, 2020 20:01:07 GMT
At least us oldies will be able to wank ourselves stupid to something like the Grattan Catalogue lingerie section if it comes to that. Millennials will be lost without internet incest porn or whatever is in this week. Can't see them managing to crack on out and having to use their imagination.
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Post by Eddie The Bastard on Mar 16, 2020 20:09:42 GMT
I did a bit of shopping for my old folks after work today. It was a good job they didn't want crisps. They were out of luck on biscuits though. Stockpiling that known source of nourishment? Fuck me.
We are going part time work from home. Week in, week not. I may not see some colleagues for ages.
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Post by pantah on Mar 16, 2020 20:20:56 GMT
Spent yesterday on the couch listening to Frank Sinatra and Nat King Cole records.
Think I’ve got the crooner virus.
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Post by Diego the toe clipper on Mar 16, 2020 22:39:48 GMT
I still can't work it out. We've had the kids off school and been working from home for over a week now. Locked down for 48 hours.
But we still have loads of bog roll. It doesn't seem to be getting used up any quicker than before.
Beer, on the other hand, is becoming critical, it appears to have adopted an "autoconsumption" ability or something. Thank fuck stupid people panic buy bog roll and not beer.
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Post by mekon on Mar 17, 2020 8:02:26 GMT
Just thought of one amazing benefit of this virus....
No Pride gatherings! It seemed never ending last year, first it was Pride York then Leeds then London then something else. Before you knew it, it had turned into a Pride summer which the gay element of work kept sending endless emails out about like recruiters.
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Post by Diego the toe clipper on Mar 17, 2020 9:21:23 GMT
Just thought of one amazing benefit of this virus.... No Pride gatherings! It seemed never ending last year, first it was Pride York then Leeds then London then something else. Before you knew it, it had turned into a Pride summer which the gay element of work kept sending endless emails out about like recruiters. Yeah right, with a bit of luck it will kill all the Jews too, right Adolf?  |
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Post by mekon on Mar 17, 2020 9:51:58 GMT
The Jews created it! Get with the programme man! I bet no Israelis have it.
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