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Post by mekon on May 10, 2021 18:31:12 GMT
Had some blood test results back and levels of inflammation are past the high end of normal. First stop..diet. Started by eating more fish, actually eating vegetables again laying off cakes and processed meat. All I've done for a week now is reek of farts. I think it's the greens, my body guts really seem to be making the most of the sulphate levels of some of them.
Almost worth dying at 60 just live a life free of flatulence.
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Post by spentcase on May 10, 2021 19:15:41 GMT
Had some blood test results back and levels of inflammation are past the high end of normal. First stop..diet. Started by eating more fish, actually eating vegetables again laying off cakes and processed meat. All I've done for a week now is reek of farts. I think it's the greens, my body guts really seem to be making the most of the sulphate levels of some of them. Almost worth dying at 60 just live a life free of flatulence. I'm a bit of a Captain Healthy, Meeks, especially Monday to Friday but I don't have much trouble. I get a lot of veg, eggs, clean meat and oat bran down my grinner and I don't fart any more than anyone else. Maybe you're body is just adjusting? I do intermittent fast 5 days a week though (16:8), fuck knows if that has any influence. But my ticker seems to be okay, my blood pressure is 120 over 75 with a pulse of 52 bpm, which is about the same as an Armstrong 500 with a Rotax single. |
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Post by Diego the toe clipper on May 10, 2021 20:40:43 GMT
I worked with an overweight KFC fan who decided to get fit by eating only fruit.
Fuck me, I used to dread the meetings in that portacabin, he did lose weight apparently, but he was so gassed up he looked fatter than before, and the smell, Jesus Christ.
Anyway Meeks, be selfish for your own wellbeing, fart free and live long.
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Post by Deleted on May 10, 2021 20:50:03 GMT
Farting is good.
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Post by spentcase on May 10, 2021 21:04:56 GMT
So when was the last time any of you cats lit your own farts? It must be 30 years for me.
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Post by Deleted on May 10, 2021 21:07:41 GMT
Long time ago! The impossible happened and it sort of exploded, I never thought that could happen outside of a confined space, but it did! Just happy that my bollox were still in the same place.
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Post by Eddie The Bastard on May 10, 2021 21:43:52 GMT
So when was the last time any of you cats lit your own farts? It must be 30 years for me. 10 to 15 here. I was teaching the young nephews important life lessons. |
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Post by armstrongracer on May 10, 2021 21:45:15 GMT
Had a workmate who was a real ale nut, one of those CAMRA bores. His flatulence got so bad it precipitated a visit to his GP. Was diagnosed as having live yeast fermenting in his guts. Nice.
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Post by Deleted on May 10, 2021 21:55:10 GMT
Had a workmate who was a real ale nut, one of those CAMRA bores. His flatulence got so bad it precipitated a visit to his GP. Was diagnosed as having live yeast fermenting in his guts. Nice. He ended up with the condition of being permanently pissed? What beer did he drink?
Asking for a friend. |
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Post by armstrongracer on May 10, 2021 23:09:11 GMT
Seem to remember it was something named after an ancient member of the clergy.
Got it! He was chugging on a peculiar old Bishop. So perhaps it wasnt fermenting yeast after all. Come to think of it his breath was pretty vile as well.
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Post by Deleted on May 11, 2021 5:13:09 GMT
I'll stay sober.
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Post by elnoodle the reasonable on May 11, 2021 8:33:41 GMT
You'll need to get sober first.
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Post by elnoodle the reasonable on May 11, 2021 8:37:31 GMT
So when was the last time any of you cats lit your own farts? It must be 30 years for me. Highly risky at our age Spentarama. One stray ignited shart and you've got a "napalm hoop" situation on your hands. I'd be writing up a full risk assessment first and have a fire crew and medics on standby. |
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Post by mekon on May 11, 2021 8:56:07 GMT
If you get blowback and the entire system goes up you've got trouble.
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Post by elnoodle the reasonable on May 11, 2021 9:35:50 GMT
Tom Cruise is 59 this year. The next Mission Impossible movie has to include an attempt at lighting a squirty fart. He likes to do his own stunts too. This could revive the entire cinema industry post-covid.
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